1. Is my front door locked? Maybe I should double-check.
2. So there PROBABLY isn’t anything in my closet… but, I mean maybe.
3. If I fall asleep right now I will get approximately 6 hours and 17 minutes of sleep.
4. WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?
5. I’m sure it was nothing.
6. But what if it WAS something…
7. Do I hear a bird? Why the fuck is a bird awake?
8. I’m too hot.
9. Ugh, I’m kinda cold now.
10. I don’t have to pee now, but I should try.
11. Why is everything more scary at night?
12. OMG “THE RING.” SAMARA, UGH.
13. My back door is locked, right?
14. If I fall asleep right now I’ll get 6 hours of sleep.
15. I can feel bags forming under my eyes.
16. I’m going to look so tired tomorrow.
17. OMG WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?
18. What would I do if someone did break in?
19. That lamp. I could use that lamp as a weapon.
20. Maybe I’ll sleep with my phone in my hand just in case.
21. I’ll just check Instagram really quick.
22. I’ll just check Facebook for a second.
23. Oh… a new OkCupid message…
24. OK. If I fall asleep now I will get approximately 5 hours and 20 minutes of sleep.
25. Did I set my alarm?
26. Oh! I never answered that text. I’ll do that now.
27. They should make something that’s in-between a sheet and a blanket.
28. Oooooh the ~cool side~ of the pillow is nice.
29. Ugh, and now it’s warm.
30. OMG what just touched my shoulder?! Was that a spider?!
31. OK, just my hair. Phew.
32. I need a haircut.
33. How much would a haircut cost?
34. Maybe I could cut it myself.
35. Nah, that didn’t look too good last time.
36. OMG WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?
37. What was that movie Brad Pitt was in where he wore that hat?
38. Basically everyone else is asleep right now I bet.
39. I should be sleeping.
40. Is that a police siren?
41. I wonder what’s going on.
42. Maybe it’s a fire.
43. Or maybe it’s a murder.
44. I wonder if any of my friends are up right now.
45. I need a new mattress.
46. I’ll sleep on my stomach.
47. I can’t breathe. I’ll sleep on my back.
48. I’ve been laying here for 2 hours now.
49. I could have done something PRODUCTIVE with those two hours.
50. I’m kind of hungry.
51. Ooh what should I eat for breakfast tomorrow?
52. I really want to sleep so I can eat breakfast soon.
53. I should call my grandma tomorrow.
54. If I fall asleep right now I will get approximately 4 hours and 45 minutes of sleep.
55. Should I even bother going to sleep at this point?
56. Screw it. *opens laptop*